Dr. Christiane Northrup:

When women understand what's available to us at birth, then we won't ever give that over to an expert .the birth power, the orgasmic power that's in our bodies. When you meet a woman who's had an ecstatic birth, can I tell you? You can't talk her into taking drugs that aren't so good for her body. You can't talk her into a hysterectomy that she doesn't need. You can't talk her into having her breasts removed. You can't talk her into a crummy diet. She's come home to her body. She knows what this body is capable of. She loves this body. This body loves her. And there's nothing like the transformation available at birth to nail that in there in such a way that she becomes illuminated, because she's a channel for life. And then she becomes a channel for life in all of its forms.

"It is possible to have an ecstatic birth-in fact, that is the best- natural high that I know of. And these states of consciousness are best reached when a woman is fully aware and fully awake. Women don't have a way to know how their body works until they really try it out in birth. I think that women can be just completely surprised by the change in them from giving birth- you have something powerful in you -that fierce thing comes up-and I think babies need moms to have that fierceness-you feel like you can do anything and that's the feeling we want moms to have.""

"Healthy wolves and healthy women share certain psychic characteristics. wolves and women are relational by nature, inquiring, possessed of great endurance and strength. they are deeply intuitive, intensely concerned with their young, their mate, and their pack. yet both have been hounded, harassed, and falsely imputed to be devouring and devious, overly aggressive, of less value than those who are their detractors...a healthy woman is much like a wolf: robust, chock-full, strong life force, life-giving, territorially aware, inventive, loyal, and roving."

Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves

"We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be." - May Sarton



I want to talk about race, class, and the culture of birth. I will do this in just a sec....hold on!

An interesting observation that I have discovered while being plumply pregnant is the reactionary comments I have recieved from working class minority women and their upper middle class contemporaries. There is a joy I sense emmenating off the working class ladies. They seem to embrace birth more naturally and with more spirit. I find it extremely sweet and endearing. Most of the commentary I recieve from our suburban matriarchy is horror stories and physical dissection: "Breastfeeding is not a desired choice, "epidurals are your best friends", etc. " I am not criticizing the upper levels of society on their opinions...I just sense a different approach to birthing and child bearing when I speak to them. This is not to say that the working class does not hold or practice truly empowered choices in regards to birthing all the time. I just sense a different sentimental primal energy emenating off them. To honor these sweet women of color, I want to bring their energy with me into my birth. I will play awesome jazz cds while I birth as a reminder of their powerful spirits. The improv and rhythm will keep me grounded and remind me of more a pureness somehow. Just wanted to share!

"Blueberry Girl" is coming!

You come up to the addict and you say to her, "You have a problem," and before you have anything, the house is burning down, because she's convinced she doesn't have a problem, and the chaos is the blockade. We all have something like that that has to do with the illness. Even if the chaos is the madness where we can't figure out why in our insistence that we must have a reason, and the idea that there isn't a reason and what if this is just an experience, what if this is (as John of the Cross would say) just a Dark Night, a situation where there is no reason and I simply need to battle my addiction to having a reason. I have an addiction to needing to have a reason, and that is what's breaking me in two, it is because I am in a situation where there is no reason, and it's me versus God. And I insist on having a reason and heaven is saying, "So, sit there. I'm not giving you a reason, pout, starve, I don't care what you do. It is what it is, and that's the reason. Because I said so, and that's all that you need to do is endure. Bask in your self pity or just say so there it is, it is as it is."



Hitting the Brick Wall, hard yet gentle is when elephant appears to shed light and wisdom. Ganesha topples obstacles; sweeps dark debris away with a wave of his trunk. He speaks of wisdom of the ancients and tells me I am whole. He fills me with wisdom and strength to see through the darkness of addiction.



Before the power of Ganesha
All barriers and obstacles are removed.
Through the wisdom of Ganesha
I draw confidence and new opportunities.
Under the love of Ganesha
I learn and grow stronger in all ways.



Ancient Power, Strength, Royalty

An Elephant totem gives you
ancient wisdom and power to draw upon.
It embodies strength and power.
Elephant people often have a very strong sex drive. Through the use of fragrances and incense,
Elephant can guide you to new energies and power.

Elephant people show great affection to their families, caring for the young and the elderly.
They also have an inborn knowledge of roots and plants.
An Elephant will give you insight into the power of the three feminine energies:
child, mother and old wise woman (or crone).
The Hindu god Ganesh, god of overcoming obstacles, is associated with the Elephant.

"Light does not come through incessant wallowing in the dark. All our rage, all our bitterness, all our fears, are stepping stones that lead through darkness into light. But they are merely stepping stones. Only from a clear vision of oneness, an experience of genuine love, can we live our own truth. Whether this experience is given through another human being or through a solitary connection with the divine, this is the experience that illumines our lives."

-Marion Woodman

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Posted by Stephanie at 5:19 PM 0 comments

Labels: Down syndrome Awareness

ADP Tour outfits...

Work Smirk....

I am burnt out in terms of work. I really do not feel in the mood to do much of it lately although I am slammed with a million little tasks right now. So what! OOOOOHHHHH...Evie is doing swirl dances in my tummy now. I can see her move and dance all day. I wonder if she is feeling squished in there yet. I read somewhere that baby's in the 3rd trimester start to dream inside the tummy-tum when they sleep now. I don't know if this is true. According to my beliefs, I've already encountered her little spirit being and I really don't think her intact soul is inside my tummy 24-7. I think she comes in once in awhile to get ready for human Earth life, but I still think she is a twinkle in the sky shining her light down on Jay and I from above. The creature in my womb will be her physcial vehicle, but I don't think (like any of us) she is restricted to that particular incarnation all the time. We shift through the timeless void as often as we sit complaining that we have no time to do anything during the day. Linear time is an illusion, but life is fun so I don't let all the contraints like that stop my imagination and instincts. Ah, little Evie I adore you so much already. My little girl. My sweet gift from the universe....